Touchstone March 2005

Church's Long Tussle Over Acceptable Marriage

By Yvonne Wilkie

The State list of ‘forbidden' marriages in the 19th century New Zealand is interesting reading and takes some sorting out of relationships referred to. Thirty forbidden marriages are listed such as the ‘husband's father's brother; or the daughter's son's wife; or the wife's daughter's daughter, which in fact is a step-daughter. The ‘forbidden' marriage that took the Presbyterian Church's attention for almost 30 years was that of the marriage to the deceased wife's sister.

“We have grave fears that this infringement of the Scriptural law of marriage which is now proposed is only the precursor to others.” The writer in his editorial for the Presbyterian “Evangelist” in 1872 was responding to Editorial views of the ‘Otago Daily Times' on the new Bill before Parliament for legalising marriage with the deceased wife's sister. He pointed out that contrary to the views of the secular press religious objection to the change could withstand any examination put forward by its opponents.

A statement circulated to Presbyterian members in Otago and Southland the same year, re-states the Scriptural understanding that when a man and women ‘unit' in marriage they become ‘one flesh' and therefore must recognise a ‘blood' relationship to the other's kin. It went onto to justify that although the Bible did not expressly prohibit marriage with the deceased wife's sister it gave sufficient examples to enforce the principle.

The Law was passed in 1881. The Northern Church agreed that they leave the decision to the conscience of both the minister and those members as to what course should be taken. The Synod decided not to take any action as they believed the law had not received Royal assent. In fact the law had been sanctioned and the Southern Church's denial of recognising the law caused ongoing delay in the Union of the two churches.

This debate reflects the tensions that could exist between State and Church. The settlers brought with them British laws. They clearly understood that the religious view of marriage stood alongside that of civil and State interest. Churches could legally validate marriages as long as they included the requirements of the law.

Wedding photo of the Rev Robert Erwin (at rear centre) to Miss Annie Jardine (in front centre) at Wanganui, early 1900's.

However, when the State began to introduce laws that appeared to challenge the Church's understanding of a Christian marriage the alliance became troublesome. The concern about mixed marriages between Roman Catholics and Protestants underlay the debates of 1920 and 1937. Could a marriage celebrant have the right to refuse to marry a couple on any grounds of inequality existing between them?

So began another 30 year debate on the inadvisability of mixed marriages. The Presbyterian's greatest concern expressed the loose of its young people to Catholicism or equally as problematic, no Church connection at all.

In 1937 and during the 1960s the General Assembly expressed its concern at the apathy people showed towards mixed marriages. Periodically a statement or study booklets were published with little overall affect. It took until 1969 for the General Assembly to recognise that mixed marriages no longer concerned the majority of Presbyterians and there seemed ‘no point in issuing a statement'.

Easing of Divorce Laws created the greatest unease among both parishioners and ministers. It is clearly visible as the debate wandered through 80 years how societal mores and values have changed the interpretation of ‘what is a Christian Marriage'?

Desertion and adultery were the only two acceptable reasons for divorce. In 1899 the Synod disagreed with the Law changes that gave women the same rights as men for the grounds of divorce, adding further causes of perpetual drunkenness. The ability to divorce on the grounds of withdrawing conjugal rights became an issue of the 1930s. As divorce increased through the 1940s into the 1950s ministers asked for a ruling from the General Assembly on remarrying a divorced person. A ruling did not eventuate but ministers were encouraged to consult members of Presbytery when confronted with a request for remarriage.

From the mid-1960s as the Church grappled with the social changes of a new era members were forced to re-examine Christian marriage. Discussions on marriage preparation and support, the inclusion of Christian vows and modernising the format and language of the marriage ceremony are found in the pages of the General Assembly reports. The option to offer a secular marriage ceremony to non-Christian couples in the early 1970s did not find approval within the Church. Its suggestion that the Registrar General be asked to open up alternatives other than the Registry Office exists today through the role of a ‘secular' celebrant.

The parallel function of the State and Church in relation to marriage is again being challenged as the State approves new understandings of what are viewed as long-term committed relationships. This chapter the Church is still writing.

© PCANZ Archives 2005

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